Bold outlaw rides a feral wind,
attacking in our waning days...
he lays down frost with single gaze.
We feel his gelid breath within--
unwelcome guest assumes his quest,
his frozen hands tear tender skin.
Long after leaves are felled, ablaze
this outlaw strikes on feral wind.
© Ginny Brannan November 2012
There's a chill wind been a blowin' up here in New England...
Sharing at d'Verse Poets Pub Open Link Night Week #69
what a beautiful poem
ReplyDeleteA beautiful poem. Could make winter feel rather welcome!
ReplyDeleteGinny...this is perfection! And I need a blanket :)
ReplyDeleteok so you made me feel very cold...smiles...love the use of gelid...one of those cool words for sure...tis the season...smiles...also like the use of desperado too....love the song...
ReplyDeleteGinny,
ReplyDeleteYou sent me to the dictionary...I was sure I'd seen 'gelid' before, but couldn't quite say what it meant! You continue your mastery of intensely focus writing. Great metaphor and super execution. Always a pleasure to stop by here and read. Stay warm! --sk
This flows so beautifully and I love your lyrical word choices, Ginny... especially like the 2nd stanza.
ReplyDeleteSuch an outlaw is a bit scary, but I'm sure the oldwest would swoon over him.
ReplyDeleteBrrrr...wonderful Ginny!
ReplyDeletewonderful flow in this ginny...and great use of the octain form..these outlaws are a bit scary in a way but then, also have their magic..right..
ReplyDeleteInteresting vocabulary. "feral wind" -- I am guessing that you are using 'feral' as a substitute for wild, but I think of feral (as in cats) as being a return to wild from domesticated -- and I could not imagine a domesticated wind.
ReplyDelete"Gelid" , I never heard of -- means frosty cold. It helped when I learned that the G is pronounced like a "j" -- maybe I will try it in conversation today. :-)
Winter as an outlaw was a great metaphor -- very fun. And thanx for the new vocab.
Sabio, thanks so much for your comments. In using the word "feral" I was going with this definition from Free Online Dictionary:
Deletea. Existing in a wild or untamed state.
Have always gone with the thought that if a poem needs to be explained, than maybe it isn't working somehow. The inspiration for this came from when I was leaving work the other evening. Was hit with a harsh cold wind and rain while walking to the car. Stung the face and instantly chilled right to the bone. Using the metaphor of outlaw for "winter" or "season's change," blowing in on a wild (feral) wind, which it certainly felt like to me.
Re "gelid", I could've used icy, cold or frozen, but how ordinary, predictable and over-used these words can be. It is so much more interesting to find new ways of saying that which is ordinary. (I have my friends from FEPC to thank for teaching me this!!)
Hey Ginny!
DeleteMy poetry intuitions are the same as yours: "if a poem needs to be explained, than maybe it isn't working somehow."
Thanx for the explanation on the words.
Hey Ginny
ReplyDeleteI'm sporting my hats and gloves earlier this year . .
gelid is such a great word and my overall impression is of a real chill - the picture is great too - I'm a sucker for anything outlawish ;D
What a gorgeous Octain. I love the wind metaphor and the imagery contained. Wonderful.
ReplyDeleteI feel this Octain as the air swirls
ReplyDeletewhat a great metaphor
enjoyed immensely