Sun brushes the horizon with a kiss
and bids adieu to daylight with a promise
that moon will share the secrets of the night.
I feel your breath upon me in the night,
entwined with you, upon my neck a kiss--
and through your lips the whisper of a promise…
Morning dawns, a new day full of promise
as pledges are remembered from the night;
your love revealed, then sealed with passion's kiss--
Did your kiss lie, will promise die with night?
© Ginny Brannan August 2012
First attempt at a tritina. The tritina is the little sister of the sestina – a variation made up of three tercets and a one-line envoy. In other words, it’s composed of ten lines, starting with three stanzas of three lines each, and then a single line to conclude the poem. The line-ending words of the tritina follow a pattern similar to that of the sestina, appearing thus: ABC, CAB, BCA with the envoy as ABC.
Shared at d'Verse Poets Pub Form For All: On Tritinas
***Linking up to d'Verse Poets Pub Open Link Night #60.
***Linking up to d'Verse Poets Pub Open Link Night #60.
oh i hope not...easy to make promises in the dark esp once the heat is going...smiles...nice progression in this from days end to something much more personal
ReplyDeletelove the intimacy in this as well ginny....gee i was so excited i posted the first comment twice...smiles....hope you are well...
DeleteFixed that Brian, only one now (was afraid if I deleted one I'd lose both, but thankfully didn't happen!) Thanks for stopping by again my friend, always good to hear from you!
DeleteAn inspiration to link each verse with a different time of day - dusk, night, dawn - and to embody the sun, the moon, the sky, with meaning at the periphery of the emotions you are evoking.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful, Ginny... I especially like the second stanza.
ReplyDeleteJust stunning, Ginny. Doesn't it seem like this form lends itself to sensuality? But then, so does the sestina which is one of my favorite forms, albeit challenging. Enjoyed this, Ginny...but I always do enjoy your work.
ReplyDeletedid your kiss lie? :( doesn't the song go "it's in his kiss. that's what it is?"
ReplyDeleteOh, I do hope the promise didn't lie. That would cut to the quick. Beautiful imagery in this Ginny.
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful write Ginny--I am not familiar enough with the form to comment on that--
ReplyDeleteThe dark can hold such promises but in the day things seem more clear, hopefully the promises are still there.
ReplyDeleteWell done on the tritina , have not tackled that one yet. Good transition from the promise of the night to the questions of the morning
ReplyDeleteI'm not familiar with the form but the poem is lovely..."entwined with you, upon my neck a kiss" ...sigh...so romantic :)
ReplyDeleteGinny,
ReplyDeleteOutstanding work within the confines of the form...it's so hard to make these interesting, given the very few word ends you''re allowed. That is so seamless and effortless, and the metaphors/comparisons are so apt! Very nice job. SK
love the intimacy in this ...tender and beautiful...and hopefully that promise didn't lie...
ReplyDeleteOk, I was so caught up in this poem that I did not even catch that it was a sestina until you mentioned it at the bottom.... Which is the earmark of an excellent form poem! But, don't get a big head yet.... cuz you are a pretty good looking gal talking about kissing and I'm a guy.... In context it's really not that hard to blow our attention spans!!!! :) All in all great poem though, few sestinas get by me without recognizing the form! And Claudia is spot-on... very intimate, very lovely...... enjoyable read....
ReplyDelete