tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post7096957410579511209..comments2024-01-27T20:35:40.798-05:00Comments on Inside Out Poetry: Ship on FireGinny Brannanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15298060016652737538noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-69652416780355084832013-03-04T04:24:09.403-05:002013-03-04T04:24:09.403-05:00Excellent descriptive piece - I can sense the terr...Excellent descriptive piece - I can sense the terror.<br /><br />Anna :o]hyperCRYPTICalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11967085628384237933noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-50745193858767118622013-03-03T17:24:03.632-05:002013-03-03T17:24:03.632-05:00There's so much more to this narrative than th...There's so much more to this narrative than the elements you have explicitly revealed - and that is one of the potential benefits of short forms. Your poem keeps the action going from start to close.<br /><br />Your poem is a quintain as it has five lines - just not one of the formally recognised (yet) forms :-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-3482345683246969722013-03-03T10:25:45.158-05:002013-03-03T10:25:45.158-05:00Wonderful vivid sound here, Ginny. The rhyme work...Wonderful vivid sound here, Ginny. The rhyme works super well. k Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-4826028766087758862013-03-03T09:55:44.631-05:002013-03-03T09:55:44.631-05:00Thank you for noticing the "other element&quo...Thank you for noticing the "other element" behind this. A poet friend of mine once said that he never posts pictures with his writing, as people see the image and then that is all the poem is about. I think I may have to start following his footsteps. The words came before the image, and this was purposely written with some ambiguity, as it is not really about a ship at all. Seems you caught that, glad someone did.Ginny Brannanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15298060016652737538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-42297570916059874402013-03-03T08:48:26.989-05:002013-03-03T08:48:26.989-05:00Inferno flares and slowly seething --a terrible ex...Inferno flares and slowly seething --a terrible experience ~<br /><br />Good one Ginny ~Scarlethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03330793338813508704noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-21413164971094242252013-03-03T05:57:08.543-05:002013-03-03T05:57:08.543-05:00Ouch, what a horrible fate you have captured.Ouch, what a horrible fate you have captured.Sabio Lantzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12963476276106907984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-30995721510230769902013-03-03T03:12:03.820-05:002013-03-03T03:12:03.820-05:00oh heck...not fun to be on a burning ship and just...oh heck...not fun to be on a burning ship and just water around...you pack lots of intensity into this short verse..like a short clip from an adventure movieClaudiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03011763027311966186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-80031730403901511112013-03-03T02:53:18.185-05:002013-03-03T02:53:18.185-05:00love the action in here, strong write and very eff...love the action in here, strong write and very effective, visually and then you have there's no resisting…while you plunder, fitting into the action oriented word base, yet, in these two phrases, a new element opens up for the reader. Strong piece. Thanks for sharing tonight.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05885047796180529498noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-19155308299162032032013-03-03T00:01:13.335-05:002013-03-03T00:01:13.335-05:00...oh, panic ensues... and reading each lines buil......oh, panic ensues... and reading each lines build an increasing tension that fit so well with your chosen subject... diverting & affecting read from you... smiles...kelvin s.m.https://www.blogger.com/profile/08116213800655914273noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-60676013556702267972013-03-02T23:34:56.056-05:002013-03-02T23:34:56.056-05:00You do a good job here, capturing the chaos and pa...You do a good job here, capturing the chaos and panic of being on a burning, sinking ship. How horrifying! I liked the quick succession of verbs in the initial lines. You pack a lot of action into this terse piece. The rhythm is strong and quick, like the beating of drums, building anticipation and dread.Ursa Bowershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13841401660100984048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3884360193624478106.post-90524698217677439952013-02-28T16:55:41.886-05:002013-02-28T16:55:41.886-05:00what a harrowing sight that would be...seeing your...what a harrowing sight that would be...seeing your ship go down and realizing if help did not arrive soon enough you would be as well....Brian Millerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00722940075884718007noreply@blogger.com